The fatigue. It's real. I've never had fatigue start messing with my brain, but over the past several days, I have noticed the toll of stress and exhaustion playing little games inside my head. I've simply had a hard time juggling the stuff of life. One evening, as we prepared to sit down to dinner, Madigan asked me a question, and I felt like I hit a wall. To answer the question felt like taking a quick stroll up Mt. Humphreys (12,637' elevation). When you no longer have the ability to answer basic questions, you can be pretty certain you also no longer have the ability to love well. Life has thrown too much at once for too long.
Our septic tank is still completely non-functional, though we seem to be making progress toward answers. We are now professionals at camping in our house.
We had a going away party for Shelly, hosted by her wonderful friend, Sue. I had not met Sue, though I had talked with her several times on the phone. When we showed up at her house, after a long day of digging a trench in our field, I walked up to her, reached out to shake her hand and said "Hi, I'm Sue." Ummm... just kidding. We laughed and I said, "Well, now you know how my week is going!" :-)
I still cannot access the places where I usually go to re-find myself, but I have found new places in the woods and I have had the best of companions in my explorations.
Our neighborhood is starting to dig through the ashes, clean the foundations and prepare to rebuild. It is absolutely shocking and beautiful to see the effect of many hands. This community will slowly rebuild and my prayer is that no one feels alone in the process.
Pepperoni and ash pizza.
As Providence orchestrated several month ago our beloved friends, Mark and Renae, had made reservations in Lake Tahoe for this week and they invited us to join them. Madigan, Kelton and I drove out yesterday and have already visited the lake and gotten in a little pool time. But, best of all we got SLEEP! The elusive wonder of sleep. We are going to soak up the mountains, the lake and the beauty of this place to find rejuvenation for the weeks/months to come.