Thursday, May 06, 2021

Though it does not belong to us...

 


So fleeting, so fragile. The minutes of each day. We take them for granted, as if they belong to us, as if we own them. They are given to us. We cannot treasure them as we should because we do not have the capacity to hold such great wealth in our hearts. One of the tragedies of being human in a broken world. 

In my Arms - by Plumb

Your baby blues

So full of wonder
Your curly cues
Your contagious smile
And as I watch
You start to grow up
All I can do is hold you tight
Knowing clouds will raise up
Storms will race in
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash all around
But you will be safe in my arms
Story books full of fairy tales
Kings and queens and the bluest skies
My heart is torn just in knowing
You'll someday see the truth from lies
Knowing clouds will raise up
Storms will race in
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash all around
But you will be safe in my arms
Castles they might crumble
Dreams may not come true
But you are never all alone
Because I will always
Always love you
Clouds will raise up
Storms will race in
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash all around
But you will be safe in my arms


I watch, captivated by the lives I see unfolding before me, by the small humans who are becoming men. I ache in my heart because I want to guard them against the pain and suffering I know this life will throw upon them, I want to give them strength where they are weak, I want to halt the storms that will threaten to blow them over, I want to keep their castles standing when they threaten to crumble... but I cannot. We are part of a broken world and that brokenness will not leave any of us untouched. I will always love, immeasurably, but I know it will not be enough. I will always hold them in my heart, in my arms, but their strength must come from above, from someone much greater than themselves. As I watch them sleep, I pray for their hearts. I pray they will always find strength in one another to climb the mountains ahead.










Lochlan woke me up yesterday morning, pressed his cheek against mine and said, "Hi. Mama." The words were timid and faltering, but they were his. I have hoped, I have grieved, I have longed to hear his voice, to see inside his heart. As he finds words (often whispered) to express himself, we are each given sight/understanding into his being and it is beautiful. So, I started the morning out with tears of joy. :-)








Our days are filled with hard work, laughter, frustration (mostly between Kelton and Paugie), bad attitudes, enthusiasm, discouragement, overwhelming hope. 





As the sun sets on this day... 


Let us look to tomorrow with hope, if not expectation. It does not belong to us, but it may well be given to us.